Sunday, September 20, 2009

Why I didn't do my reading for class...

Dear Prof. Rose,
I apologize for not doing my reading for class last week. I sure am glad you didn't call on me. You see, I had a bit of an adventure which left me unable to comprehend the proxy voting corporate law cases I was supposed to plow through.
Let me explain further...
The faucet in the tub in our bathroom has been leaking for about a week, and Crystal isn't very happy about it. It drips more than two gallons in eight hours (she tried to catch the excess in a tub to use in watering the garden) and she doesn't want to waste so much water. On Monday night, she went out to dinner with some lady friends and I stayed home to get study, get Clara to bed and fix the leak. We had checked out a plumbing book from the library earlier that day and I was perusing it after Crystal left when I decided to work on the leak for a few minutes before it was time for Clara to go to bed. I thought Clara would get a kick out of watching me work.
I went to the basement to turn off the water and then went to the second floor to work on the faucet. I took it apart and figured out there is a cartridge which plugs into the pipes and then a valve regulates how much hot or cold water to let out the faucet.
After taking everything apart, I couldn't find anything amiss, so I put it back together and went two flights down to turn the water back on. I went back up and it was still leaking. With the water still on (cue laughter now, I know) I tried to work on it again. As I slowly unscrewed the ring holding the cartridge in place, water started leaking out. I recognized that this was from the water being on, so I took a washcloth, dried the ring off and continued to unscrew it. Of course you know what happened next; as I turned the ring off the last thread, a geyser erupted from the wall, soaking me and spraying all over the bathroom. Clara was delighted all the water and hubbub, and I wasn't excited about being wet.
I sprinted down the hall (with the sounds of roaring water and laughing Clara in the background) dropped my soaking cell phone on the carpet and dropped down the two flights of stairs to the basement, where I turned off the water.
Then, I ran back up in time to throw down all the towels I could find (and one of Crystal's rag rugs) to soak up the water which was filling the tile and lapping at the carpet of our bedroom. I got as much of the water up as I could and then hung all the soaking fabrics on the curtain rod to dry. At this point, a little giggling girl came running down the hall with a big smile and my cell phone. Before she could splash my Blackberry in the puddle, I took it away. She didn't even flinch, though, because she was already back on the floor playing in the water. I then re-assembled the faucet and went back downstairs to try the water again.
As I left the basement and walked through the kitchen, I noticed the sound of water and noticed a stream of liquid pouring out of the light fixture in the ceiling above the kitchen sink. Worried that I'd ruined everything, I turned the water off again. Figuring I should just give up before the house flooded or Clara had a meltdown, I (only an hour or so late) warmed up a bottle of milk, put Clara in some (dry) pajamas and helped her get to bed.
As I stumbled back down the stairs, I realized there was less water coming from the ceiling as my puddles upstairs dried out (turns out the bathroom floor isn't made to hold gallons of water) and so I was glad I hadn't ruined all our plumbing. I then sat on the couch and opened my book to study. I read a paragraph before I realized that none of the words in it had made any sort of impression on, so I closed it and then just sat on the couch. My mind was frazzled and I couldn't focus.
Then, Crystal called. She had had a wonderful time and was coming home. I explained how the time hadn't been so great for me, but that Clara had loved it. Crystal was concerned, but not as bad as I had thought, comforted me and thanked me for trying. We turned the water back on, no more leaks appeared in the kitchen ceiling and we're not going to use that shower for a while.
So, that is why I am not prepared for class. I appreciate your understanding.
Thank you,
Jordan

PS - On Saturday, Crystal and I attacked the problem together, ending up with a $40 replacement cartridge from Home Depot. The cartridge didn't fit quite right, but after a time we took a piece of the old one and a piece of the new one and put the whole thing back together. It now only leaks a little bit. I think I'll have to keep working on this, but I promise I'll do my homework before I try again.

3 comments:

Maren said...

One of the many joys of owning a home!! I'm very grateful that the Muhlestein men are handy even if there are some interesting bumps along the way.

Rebecca said...

You must post this other places. I was chuckling as I was reading, then burst out when the water did. Hope you have recovered.

Ali said...

This makes me ok with renting a while longer :) I wonder what was going on in Clara's head- "Has Daddy gone mad?! I love this!"